In stock. Limit 3 per customer. Ships from United States.
Sold and Shipped by Newegg
As the line between our online lives and our meat-space time blurs more and more, it’s crucial that your PC become more than just a tool for work or play. It must adapt and bridge the narrowing gap between smart appliance and home computer.
We realize that there are two major biological needs that take you away from your PC, and while we haven’t mastered our strategy for one of them yet, we have conquered the need to get up and grab a drink.
To that end, we here at Newegg are proud to introduce the first in a new line of products we call “PC-PLIANCES.” Meet the Newegg Hydrator, powered by Intel, built by ENIAC.
The recipe is simple: mix one part home computer, one part media center, and one part beverage dispenser, with five refillable reservoirs, and a dash of PC components. Shake well1 and pour over an Intel 11th Gen Rocket Lake CPU in a top-of-the-line PC case.
Garnish with custom lighting effects and you’ve got the Hydrator: The world’s first Home Computer and Intelligent Beverage Dispenser.
The machine is a blend of top-of-the-line PC components and the latest in cutting edge field of Bevfreshment technology. The refillable reservoir containment cylinders come preloaded² with five carefully formulated nonperishablicious BevroDrink™ Liquidients™!
It also features the world’s most advanced soft drink software AI mixologist, the Wood-E Droid Bevtender™ powered by Raspberry Pi, running a CH33 R/s protocol. It knows which Liquidients™³ are loaded in the dispenser reservoirs and will recommend delicious cocktails that can be made with the combinations available. With classic recipes like:
The case is specially designed to keep your components and mixing ingredients cool, but what if it’s a chilly winter night and you also need a little extra PC performance. Well, you can just switch the machine into “Overclock/Hot BevroDrink™ Mode⁴” and let the extra energy consumption and heat generation make you a nice Hot Holiday Cider-aid™.
Best of all, every Wood-E Droid Bevtender™ recipe and all BevroDrink™ Liquidients™ are completely soy, dairy, sugar, gluten, alcohol, and hydrogen free!
|Processor||Intel Core i9-11900K|
|Processor Main Features||64 bit 8-core 16-thread processor|
|Cache Per Processor||20MB L3|
|Memory||Short-term & highly limited|
|Power Supply||Corsair HX Platinum 850W 80+ Full Modular|
|Cooling System||Eeeeeeeeven MORE Custom|
|Operating System||Windows 10 Taproom Edition|
|CPU Type||Intel Core i9 11th Gen|
|CPU Speed||88MPH @ 1.21GW|
|L3 Cache Per CPU||20MB|
|CPU Main Features||We already said this. Pay attention.|
|GPU/VGA Type||ASUS Rog-Strix-RTX3090|
|Video Memory||Killing the Radio Star|
|Virtual Reality Ready||Sure|
|Hydrated Reality Ready||24/7|
|Memory Capacity||Not what it used to be|
|Memory Speed||Depends how full the tanks are|
|LAN Speed||1220 km/h|
|UR Beverage||McGuffin #5112 Universal Wall Tap|
|PS/2||1x PS/2 keyboard/mouse port|
|Video Ports||1 x HDMI 2.1|
3 x Display Port 1.4a
|Rear USB||4 x USB 3.2 Gen 1|
2 x USB 2.1/1.1
|Rear Audio Ports||Any in a storm|
|Hardware||Raspberry Pi powered tablet|
|OS||Wood-E Droid AI Bevtender™|
|Liquidient™ capacity||2x 190ml reservoir|
3x 300ml reservoir
|Included Liquidients™||RAMberry Juice|
|PCI Slots (Available/Total)||Available for a price|
|Mouse Type||Northern Grasshopper|
|Keyboard Type||Casio Maestro Pro XL|
|Dimensions (H x W x D)||36” x 24” x 36”|
|Date First Available||04/31/21|
Pros: Doesn’t complain about mess, smell, rent, or bills.Pours delicious drinks
Cons: Not a great listener
Other Thoughts: *Belch*
Pros: Great for playing games and dispensing drinks. Compliments my Cooler Master Chicken console well.
Cons: Doesn’t toast bread very well.
Other Thoughts: . . . I think I’ve made a tremendous mistake
Pros: I’ve had sleven drinksh so far amd I fe3l fiwefv al;sdv ioasdflk
Other Thoughts: If tuna is the chicken of the sea, what is chicken the land of?